Im not always the strong one....

So ive learned over the last several months just what it means to be tough and commited.. ive always thought of myself as being a tough one, i came from a tough mother and ive delivered two babies, and im married to jonathan walker, of course im tough.. lol...

But there are days, especially nights when im laying in bed all alone, that i just cry.. just break on down. Now i know that some people have it so much worse than me, some wive's husbands never came home and they will spend the rest of their lives with that sense of longing to see him. But i suffer just like them. I dont cry in front of my girls because it makes them sad too, and i dont want them to think that mama is cracking, and i try not to cry in front of jonathan because i think it hurts his feelings too.... But thats apart of being human, not to mention a woman. God knew even before i was born that i was destined to be a military wife and i truely believe he has put obstacles in my life to teach me patience, and to show me that I dont always have to pretend that im heartless, its okay to cry. Even Jesus wept when he prayed to God in the garden before the guards took him to be slain for us. He wept to God and prayed and prayed. God knew that Jesus needed him at that time, and He was with Him even until the end. God puts heartache in our lives for reasons, whether to teach us to come to Him when times get rough rather than fixing it ourselves, or just to show us that we are not invincible. I think today about a friend, that suffered a great loss a few years ago. Somebody she loved was taken from her, and i just cant imagine how much pain she must have felt, but God was with her. Today shes SO happy, shes been blessed with a wonderful husband, precious little boy, and so much opportunity. God prepared her a long time ago to be tough and to keep pushing on even when it seemed like she wouldnt be able to face another day. IT IS OKAY TO CRY.... God gave us tears for expression, and He knows every tear that hits the ground and why it was there to start with. Deployments are hard, and some of the strongest women in the world, are military wives and girlfriends. God has a special place in His heart for us, because we sacrifice our lives for people that we barely know, now thats commitment to country. So go ahead and cry, and look forward to the day when tears of sorrow will not be nessessary anymore, only the joy of Heaven and being with our Savior will be all we ever think about.  I hope everyone has a great day...

Got you a verse..

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”   Rev 21:4

Now if thats not something to look forward too.. i dont know what is....

With all my love....
Meg

What 9/11 meant to me....

I sat in the livingroom with my two sweet little girls this morning and watched ABC's coverage of the 9/11 memorial. As many of you might have child that was not here at that time, Macy was glued to the TV, asking questions that i did my best to answer. I explained to Macy that this is a reason why daddy is gone right now, because he has to keep things like this from happening again. She responded that she was proud that daddy took the time to see about others..lol. 10 years have come and gone, i can still see myself sitting in 10th grade english watching it on the TV, our lives as a nation were changed forever... 3,000 people perished that day, and some stood by and wondered.. Where is God? Why is He allowing this to happen to us? Why wont He help us? God was with each and everyone that day, from the ones that came from the rubble, to the people sitting at home watching it on TV, He never forgot us, and im sure that when it all happened, His heart was breaking. 9/11 changed my life as well, but not until almost 5 years later when i married a soldier from Hickory, MS. I always feared that he would be sent away, and he has, but just as i told Macy this morning... daddy has a very important job to do, and this is why. 9/11 may have shattered our spirit, but only for a moment. We are a mighty nation that has simply lost its way,and its sad that it takes a tragedy to make us realize how much we need to help each other and do what we have to do to make our nation stronger. Please continue to pray for our troops overseas, because of them we have the freedom to keep the people we lost on 9/11 alive without being harassed. God bless America, and God bless the 204th!!!

With love... Meg